Relief

You would think that as time goes by, clinic visits would become easier for us, but that just isn't the case...yet.  We had our monthly clinic visit scheduled for next Tuesday, but I called this morning to see if we could change it to tomorrow, so that I can take the kids out of town for a week plus.  Dr. French wasn't in tomorrow, but they could squeeze us in today.  Alright, we'll take it (insert increased anxiety).

Why after all this time are we still nervous?  Last month we went in feeling pretty good and then got Maggie's counts and were a bit disappointed.  Maggie's ANC (fights infection) was 1380.  We've always been told that 1500 is normal, so we saw it as below normal.  In the last several months, Maggie's ANC has slowly trended down and this has made us slightly worried.  Dr. French said that her numbers were fine and not to worry, but this past month we have unfortunately done just that...worry.  Yes, we are told not to, but it is hard when you've lived through what we have lived through.

So, our thoughts all month have been, "we just need to get to this next clinic appointment and counts."  And that moment came very quickly upon us this morning.  And how did she do?  Excellent.  Relief, complete relief and happiness is what we felt once her numbers came in.  Maggie had an ANC of 2100.  Perfect numbers.  We are so happy and for once in a long time, we feel that we can relax and enjoy our life.  I can't promise that worry won't creep up on us and we won't analyze every little bruise and mark, but for this one brief moment we have complete relief knowing that Maggie is PERFECT.  That feeling is one of the best feelings ever.

We attended the Emily's Beads of Courage Dayton Dragon's
event a couple of weeks ago.