No Worry

Today marks a big day for us.  We went to the clinic for monthly labs and they came back great (though this was the first time we didn’t have the port and unfortunately Maggie is a very hard stick.  She ended up having to give 3 vials of blood through a finger prick, which I’m told hurts worse than using a vein).  Maggie was so brave and did so well.  She didn’t shed a tear when they were searching for a vein with the needle in her arm.  Squeezing the blood from her finger was the most painful part and she told me she didn’t want to go to her doctor’s appointment ever again.  We got the great news that we will be moving to every other month appointments now.  This is a great feat as it means that she is further along post-treatment and every month she goes in remission is a month closer to being cured (5 years post-treatment is considered “cured”).  While this is excellent news, there is a sense of comfort in getting counts checked monthly.  On the other hand, monthly appointments also bring on a nervousness that would otherwise not be there. 

Another reason why this is a big day is that Colin is the age that Maggie was at her diagnosis.  It brings on many different emotions.  I mentioned this day to one of the nurses today and she remembers Maggie the day she was diagnosed.  She remembers her pudginess and red hair.  She and everyone we meet always comment on how Maggie and Colin look so much alike (minus the color of hair).  It’s sad to remember that this innocent little baby was about to start the hardest road of her life.  It’s cruel what she had to endure and no baby should ever have to experience that. 

Though Colin’s chances of getting leukemia are very small, I still worry about him.  And for this reason, getting to today and having him healthy is a big milestone (for me anyways).  I will probably continue to check off big milestones related to cancer, for example, him turning a year and being cancer free (because I now know that his survival rate just increased by 30%).  It’s just the way my mind works now. 

Clinic days and blood count days will always be a big day for us.  If this day ever becomes routine, it will be amazing.    But regardless of the type of day it is, we will always celebrate because we will never take for granted great counts.  So today, we celebrate because for at least today, there is NOTHING to worry about!   No lung issues, no cancer issues, only a mild case of acid reflux (but we can live with that).  Ahh, how nice it is to say that.